welcome to the organic green doctor blog

i am a family physician who was diagnosed with
early mild cognitive impairment(mci) amnestic type on december 21, 2010
this is a precursor to alzheimers disease
because of this diagnosis i have opted to stop practicing medicine
this blog will be about my journey with this disease
please feel free to follow me along this path
i will continue blogging on organic gardening, green living,
solar power, rainwater collection, and healthy living
i will blog on these plus other things noted to be interesting

Wednesday, December 28, 2016

it was painful to watch

someone asked me
what do you think

all i could say was
it was painful real painful to watch

my wife she and i only go to one movie theater
to watch movies
its called the alamo drafthouse

you can go there
sit in nice seats
eat a nice meal
have a glass of wine
not have anyone disturb you

if someone does
as they say right before the movie comes on
we will kick your ass out
they mean it

now as we watched the movie
well folks were noisy
i was one of them
there was this occasionally nervous laughter
mostly sobbing

yes it was painful to watch

Image result for manchester by the sea
the movie
manchester by the sea

my wife she had seen it at a festival
got to listen to the director and writer talk after the movie
even shook his hand and hugged him
after seeing the movie
i would have hugged him too

it was painful to watch
oh i said that once already didnt i

well it was true

as i watched
the pain just oozed from the screen
it was hard to watch
mainly because of all those tears in my eyes
that made it hard to focus

all i could think was
you have to walk in ones shoes to understand them

painful some real painful memories came flooding
into my brain

the death of my mom and her painful to us final course
the death of my younger brother
his death seemed so unfair
the death of my first patient
the death of my first pediatric patient who i had got so
close to over a short period of time
the flood of the memory of seeing his story on tv one night
several years later
the death of my first infant that i had cared for her mom in
the pregnancy
the death of a young close friend

all these things came flooding back into my brain

i guess thats why this movie grabs folks so hard when
they see it

these are the movies that should be made
everyone should go see it
its sort of cathartic in a way
my experiences werent as bad as his i think

this is a movie you should go see

this is a movie you will not want to go and see twice

i dont think i could do it again

it was just so painful to watch

the organicgreen doctor

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