welcome to the organic green doctor blog

i am a family physician who was diagnosed with
early mild cognitive impairment(mci) amnestic type on december 21, 2010
this is a precursor to alzheimers disease
because of this diagnosis i have opted to stop practicing medicine
this blog will be about my journey with this disease
please feel free to follow me along this path
i will continue blogging on organic gardening, green living,
solar power, rainwater collection, and healthy living
i will blog on these plus other things noted to be interesting

Thursday, October 19, 2023

talked at the walk


thats me trying to talk at the walk to end alzheimers this last weekend in santa barbara in the middle of the eclipse
i say trying because it took me awhile to recover myself before i could do my 5 minute talk

the picture is blurry since its from a video
thats the way i felt when i was talking

now i have talked at a walk to end alzheimers somewhere every year since 2010
i must say this time it was harder for me to get started
much harder than usual

one thing i learned since the first time i did this at the santa barbara walk to end alzheimers in 2017 was to not look at my family because if i did i would not be able to finish
one year ms b was younger and she cried out granddaddy 
it did take me awhile to compose myself on that day

the one i cried the most was when we did the walk to end alzheimers in little rock arkansas the year my younger brother died from alzheimers 
his family was there
there is no way i could have talked that day

i got a reprieve during the pandemic since we did a virtual walk for two years
no crying that year well i did cry some

this year though i said i wasnt going to cry and choke up before i talked
that didnt last long
i almost wasnt able to get started this year

well it started with this talented singer singing the nat king cole song unforgetable

this song by the talented singer in this setting was more than most of us could handle
there were tears flowing throughout the crowd of about 600 folks

for me it brought back a flood of memories while i was standing near the stage waiting to talk about my story with alzheimers 
i thought of my mothers battle with alzheimers  and my younger brothers battle that started at such a young age
both battles ended like alzheimers usually does in the final stage
it wins ugly

i thought of them a lot while he was singing 
crying the whole time me not him

thinking of my journey and where would it go after finishing the study 
when will my disease take off
seeing my two grandkids in the audience and thinking of the other two grandkids
how long will i get to enjoy them and remember it
how long will my wife she and i be meaningfully together

all that was going through my head when i was standing up there waiting

next the person with the yellow flower for a caregiver stared talking about her granddad barely able to talk
then the person with the purple flower for someone who lost a loved one had trouble talking
then i got the blue flower for the someone with the disease

by the time all those folks choked up cried sobbed and talked combined with that rendition of unforgettable 
i really had a hard time starting to talk
i almost walked off the stage
i took a deep deep breath looked up into the skies where the eclipse was fading away
thought of mom
thought of my younger brother
thought of my family 
i said 
you have to do this 
i did
yes i made folks cry even more

i think as we walked looking back at the turf on the field where everyone was standing
it was soaking wet from tears

i must say it was one of our better walks
the walk will raise close to a quarter of a million dollars
most of the funds will go to research and to the important alzheimers education

these walks and talks are hard to do but i do them since i know they are important to us in the alzheimers world

you also can still donate to my team organicgreendoctor linked below

our santa barbara walk to end alzheimers was on saturday october 14th
donate here to our organicgreendoctor team or donate to your own local walk team

the organicgreen doctor

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