welcome to the organic green doctor blog

i am a family physician who was diagnosed with
early mild cognitive impairment(mci) amnestic type on december 21, 2010
this is a precursor to alzheimers disease
because of this diagnosis i have opted to stop practicing medicine
this blog will be about my journey with this disease
please feel free to follow me along this path
i will continue blogging on organic gardening, green living,
solar power, rainwater collection, and healthy living
i will blog on these plus other things noted to be interesting

Wednesday, December 9, 2020

my story revisited #69 -my aricept dreams revisited


i have always had dreams but they became much more vivid once i started aricept (donepezil) about 10 years ago for my mci due to alzheimers disease
my dreams havent been the same since
they are more involved and more vivid since starting the aricept

it may be the aricept that has slowed down my symptoms since i have remained stable for the last ten years

the dreams arent usually violent though
recently though when i started some medications for my stomach the dreams changed and got more disturbing so i stopped the meds
some of the stomach meds made my dreams more pleasant and enjoyable
i also developed bad violent dreams when i started some of the supplements i took for a while
i had to also stop those because of the bad dreams

so usually the dreams arent bad ones though
i do sometimes i guess act them out in bed which makes my wife a little nervous sometimes
usually its if i have a disturbing dream if its an issue

last night i had an interesting dream
now i have been awake a couple of hours and some of the dream and its purpose has faded some

last night we were living in our house we lived in during the 1990s
my nephew and his wife came to visit us from arkansas
they looked like they did in the 1990s
she is a nurse who in my dream had just got the ok to start diagnosing and treating patients with covid 19 since a shortage of doctors had developed since the system was overwhelmed

while she and my nephew were there an old class mate of mine from medical school and residency dropped by unannounced to visit
he and his wife looked like they did when we were in the family medicine residency program
we had a lengthy visit and i can remember discussing the covid 19 situation with my niece and my friend the doctor

we all also went to a horseshow and later my sons high school football game

as i was figuring out what the storyline of my dream was i woke up and lost most of the dream

when you talk to folks on aricept many will admit to having more vivid dreams
mine are not usually disturbing unless some monster is trying to catch me

dreams also can be a part of the disease process and i am aware of that

worsening dreams or worsening acting out dreams can mean the disease is progressing

in the meantime 
i just enjoy them when i can 
one of the side effects of taking aricept (donepezil) is that you
have these fantastic dreams
the dreams are vivid hd dreams
they are never violent or disturbing

last night in my dream my wife she and my cowgirl sisterinlaw she
went horseback riding
my younger son he went to work out at the gym
my brothers and i and my parents were staying at a cabin in the
mountains somewhere i am not sure where
it was a beautiful place

they were all late getting back from their rides and gym and our
meal got cold
it was raccoon cooked with an apple in its mouth
(i ran into a raccoon early the morning before he was getting into
our cats food-teach him huh)
there was dressing and greens and veggies surrounding that
old raccoon
i got mad cause they were late but didnt yell or throw things
i just gave them my stare that im told i have
no violence

later we all got together again at a mountain resort that had an
alzheimers center and we had a similar meal that was enjoyed
by all
although i dont remember eating any raccoon in my dream

i woke up and felt like i was still in that resort
i just hope my wife she didnt leave me there

so thats my aricept (donepezil) world i live in
heres hoping you dont have to join me there

for the last 5 years since i have been on aricept (donepezil)
for possible alzheimers disease
i have had dreams every night
usually none of these are bad dreams
almost fun dreams to have
waking up i feel good about them
i commonly will tell them to my wife she
she usually gets amused when i tell the story line

recently in my dreams there are a large group of folks
trying to get me and hurt me
deranged medical people
my wife she says i start squirming around in bed
thrashing sometimes
heck i got to beat them off  someway

she says she never wakes me up
afraid i might think she was one of the attackers
i usually remember the dreams when i wake up
heck i even yell she says
whoo whoo i scream

i have awoken occasionally when i was in the attack
mode defending myself

i know its the aricept
i call them my aricept dreams

but last night was a different dream
maybe it was because of the blog i wrote yesterday
about dying

there was a young boy my guess from the dream he was
about 7 or 8 years old
he had a terminal brain cancer that was not responding to
he only had a short time to live

they even did a story on him on the evening news
i think it was lester holt from nbc that interviewed
the family
sad story it was

however in the story there was a new drug that had
only been used in animal studies like a chimpanzee
with the same brain tumor
it was cured with the new cancer drug

however it never had been used in humans before
no doctor would order the treatment with the new drug
maybe the childs only chance for survival

ordering the drug was not legal
they looked for a doctor to order it

so they contacted me
why me i asked
well for one you dont have your license anymore
so you dont have a license to lose
but you are still a medical doctor
once a doctor always a doctor guess that cant be taken away

then they said
you know you are like that little boy you know
you both have a terminal condition for which there is no cure

he an aggressive brain cancer
you you probably have alzheimers disease
both of you will probably die from your disease

both you and he dont really have much to lose do you

the worst that will happen to you is that you will be arrested
sent to jail forever
heck at least my long term care when its needed would
be covered

so i agreed
even got interviewed by lester holt on national tv
with the mother at my side
both of us and lester holt were crying during the interview

near the end of the dream
after the first treatments were given
the young child was responding to treatment
hope for a recovery and cure was there

then i woke up

damn those aricept dreams
heres hoping my dreams are pleasant ones in the future

the organicgreen doctor

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